Topics > Aggressive Behaviors

Understanding

Many caregivers wonder what is and what is not normal aggressive behavior.  For starters...How much fighting is considered normal among siblings?  What age should this behavior be expected to stop? What degree of assertiveness is appropriate among peers?  What does typical teen resistance towards authority look like? The best answer to this question is if the behavior is seen as a concern by the child's teachers, peers, and/or parents, it most likely is one. 

All children consider engaging in aggressive behavior, and within certain limits, these impulses and even the occasional occurrence should be seen as a normal and healthy part of development.  However, the impulses can quickly cause problems when the child does not posses the self-control to manage their feelings.  By developmental age 3 to 4, children should know that verbal and physical aggression is not acceptable. Parents should expect their children to displayappropriate behaviors when angry or frustrated.  This means, that the teaching needs to begin early on.   

It is important to realize that aggressive behaviors function for one/many of the following reasons: to gain access to attention, gain access to a denied item/activity, escape a demand, and/or for sensory input.  Challenges such as Autism and/or ADHD, may make the behavior more pronounced and definitely tougher to treat.  However, the functions still remain the same.   Most importantly, if you are unsure of when it is appropriate and how to address the behaviors, it is highly recommended that you seek assistance in developing a plan of action to make sure the concerns do not escalate into a problem.